7 Secrets To Success
by Phoebe Kitanidis
Some lessons just can’t be found in your textbooks. They’re life lessons—everyday truths that can make the difference between frustration and fabulous success. Girls who’ve picked up these insights have more fun and higher confidence, and they achieve more. Want in? Just keep reading…
Dive into the moment. Have you ever felt so into what you were doing, you didn’t have time to feel self-conscious? Whether it’s improvising in drama class or joking with your friends after school, when you embrace an activity fully, you shine without worrying—and it feels great! On the other hand, “playing it cool” can make you feel bored and lonely. So the next time you find yourself on the sidelines, be brave, take a deep breath, and jump right in.
Goal setting works…honest. It’s not just for superstars—any girl can set a goal and make it happen. The key is to find the method that works best for you. Some girls write down a simple statement (“I will practice my pitching every day this month”) and read it twice a day. Others split up their goal into bite-sized chunks and check each one off as it’s accomplished. Whatever your method, dream big, write it down, and don’t let yourself get discouraged!
Have a friend for every occasion. Even the coolest BFF can’t fulfill all your friendship needs, so forget being joined at the hip. It doesn’t mean you don’t love her anymore. It’s just that life is richer when you have a host of casual friends to share moments with: someone to chat with in science class, camp buddies to see every summer, a cousin who’s your fashion mentor, a neighbor to bike to the park with. Every friend you make will teach you something new, so start talking to people and start learning!
Accept your flaws. So you have a pudgy tummy…or you can’t carry a tune…or you’re a bit of a klutz. News flash: You’re a human being, and not one of us is perfect. You don’t have to like your flaws—and you certainly should work toward making changes if you’re unhappy about something—but why waste your time hating (part of) yourself? Accept the imperfect bits you can’t change, because they’re part of what makes you, you.
Ignore put-downs. No matter how popular you are, there always will be people you can’t please. You have a choice: You can focus on what they’re saying about you, or you can just shrug and shift your focus to people who appreciate you. The first approach is like punching a brick wall. The second frees up your energy for something more worthwhile (not to mention more fun!).
Make kindness your purpose. A purpose is bigger than a goal; it’s more like the deeper reason for all your goals. A purpose runs through everything you do and motivates you to keep going. It helps keep your actions matched up with your beliefs. If you commit to being kind, you’ll help make the world a better place, and set an inspiring example to other people.
Trust yourself. Seek out advice from trusted counselors (parents, friends, teachers, coaches) but also learn to value your own opinion. Spend a few minutes by yourself each day to get in tune with your feelings: Read a book, listen to music, or just daydream. Make sure you’re on speaking terms with your intuition—that inner voice that warns you and advises you—and don’t let anyone else’s voice drown it out. No matter how smart or old or famous someone else is, they’ll never be as big an expert on you as you are.
